Taking a Break from a Break

I haven't written in a while and it's because I'm feeling lazy. It's the Easter long weekend and I just can't bring myself to studying anything, despite knowing how ridiculously behind I am in my work. Every year it seriously feels like failure is right around the corner and I just manage to scrape through.

Perhaps I've convinced myself that this is routine and that I'm simply going through the motions of surviving the assessment unit's cunning and horrible multiple choice questions.

Or it could be that I just can't be bothered anymore. Every time I take a break from studying or clinical work I feel guilty - I should be studying because there is always things that need to be learnt, always more patients to see, examine, assess, investigate and manage.

It's all about procrastination and I'm using this long weekend as my procrastination period. I just hope it doesn't follow me into the end of my surgical rotation. It's been following me most places and it's so easy to get distracted with the internet, computers and people in general.

So I am blogging now because I don't want to look at the medical core curriculums that are going to be tested; all four of them... and the surgical core curriculum, that will test most all surgical specialties and some subspecialties.

I am worried.. but right now, not enough to do anything. I can only hope that I don't pay the ultimate price... that would be a cause of a lot of suffering. Too much.